Thank You

The pain was great-so great
     I thought I couldn't bear it.
Worst of all I felt like
     with no one I could share it.
Time was like an empty cellar
     meaning loss and void.
When someone said "There's reasons"
     it made me feel annoyed.
I believed there was a God
     who listened and loved me.
And time on time I'd ask
     from this pain he'd set me free.
I'd beg that He would give me
     what my heart was crying for.
Then waited for an answer
     only to find that He'd ignore.
Then one day someone made me see
     what I was doing wrong.
I wanted to sing my way
     and make up my own song.
I was saying "Lord give me,
     I just can't live without."
Forgetting through my selfish pride,
     what God is all about.
I got down on my knees
     and said "Oh God forgive,
my lack of humbling myself-
     for losing my will to live.
God carry through with my life
     the plan you had in store.
Forgive me for my selfish prayers
     that I had prayed before.
I do not understand sometimes.
     we have to hurt so bad.
I'm sure to see your children cry
     it makes you too feel sad.
So here I am, though still confused
     I think I'm gonna make it.
Your love was there I only had
     to just reach out and take it.
You, through Jesus, share my pain
     it doesn't quite seem fair,
but I couldn't make it through this life,
     if you weren't always there.
Thank You."

Sue Holms